This week we celebrate the birth of our Savior. I love Christmas the best of all the holidays. I love to see the colorful lights in the neighborhoods, especially when there is a white snowy backdrop. It brings to me a feeling of serenity and joy. It signifies that there is something different and special about this time of year. I spend a lot of time outside listening to music and running up and down our driveway. It is how I clear my head and blow off steam before I can settle down for bed.  I love being out there, especially now when I can see the lights and feel the spirit of the season.  I love to look at the stars and imagine being there, on a hillside near Bethlehem, tending sheep. I think that if I lived back then that would have been something that I could have done and would have enjoyed.  Sheep don’t expect a lot of conversation, and I imagine that the shepherds were men of few words. But the sheep knew them by their deeds in leading them and keeping them safe.  I would have wanted to be like that.  I like to imagine the angel appearing and speaking to me, giving me glad tidings, and filling my heart with joy. I would also have wanted to go and see.  I imagine walking through the busy town, feeling out-of-place and distracted, while looking for a manger, a shelter for animals, a place where I would have felt the most comfortable in all the city.  That place would have felt to me like the perfect place for the Lamb of God to be born.  I imagine feeling drawn to the spot but also somewhat uncertain if I belonged at such a holy event.   But then, I imagine seeing Mary’s eyes welcoming me in to come and see.  I would have approached slowly, reverently, and gazed in the face of The Redeemer of the World and would have had a moment of remembrance and recognition.  He would have looked at me with eyes that said, “I know you.  I love you.”  That experience would have stayed with me forever.   May we all find time to leave behind the hustle and bustle of Bethlehem, find the quiet of the humble manger, gaze into the eyes of the Savior, and remember that He knows us.  He loves us.  And let that carry each of us forward to a great new year.   Merry Christmas. 

It has been a while since I’ve written a post in my blog, but today I must speak out. I am shocked and appalled by what happened yesterday. I have never been a fan of President Trump but never imagined that a person whom the people of America chose to be our leader would ever incite the kind of violence that played out yesterday by a mob of his angry supporters. I am also shocked at how easy it appeared for them to breach the security of our nation’s capitol. Those scenes that I saw on TV felt surreal, and it was difficult to believe that it was happening in our country. But today is a new day, and we all must now face the question: Where does our country go from here? I am encouraged by the fact that the democratic process was upheld in the end. Many of those who previously supported the President in spite of himself decided last night that enough was enough and put country over party. I hope that the next few weeks results in justice served for those who threatened the rest of us and that the new administration will work together in a way that will strengthen, not erode, the principles that the founding fathers put in place exactly for times like these. Without those principles, I would fear greatly for the future of our democracy. Because of them, I know we will survive. May we, as citizens of the great experiment of democracy, prove to the world that we will never continue to grant power or give respect to any individual who seeks it for personal gain or to satisfy his own pride rather than as a means to provide for and protect the values for which this nation stands. Aaron.

As I live through one of history’s major pandemics, it gives me pause to consider the implications and ramifications on our society.  I think about all the lives lost and the economic suffering, and it makes me sad that so many people are struggling so badly.  I am thankful that my own family has been spared so far, but I worry every time my dad goes to work in the hospital. The next wave of Covid in Colorado might be just around the corner.     As someone with autism, social distancing does not feel like a crisis to me, so I guess I have a hard time understanding why people are willing to risk their lives and the lives of others (who may not have even made the same choice) to hang out with friends at places like bars and beaches.    How has being willing to wear a face mask in public turned from a public health policy that helps all of us into a political issue that pits one party against another?   How do our highest governmental leaders not set an example for the rest of the nation which then requires the public health officials to work twice as hard to reset the expectations and educate the public on the risk of the virus?    I just don’t understand how our country, the supposed richest and freest in the world, now leads the world in virus cases and deaths by such a wide margin.  Don’t tell me it’s about testing.  It’s not.  It’s about an unwillingness to give up little freedoms temporarily for the benefit of others.   It is truly tragic to me that we have that level of selfishness.   As cases again explode all over the country, I can only pray for the healthcare workers and the essential workers who put their lives on the line so that some can express their “freedom” by not wearing masks and gathering in crowds.   If only the consequences of your choices were yours only . . .    Let’s be smarter, less partisan, less selfish, more considerate, more kind, more willing.    Aaron.  

Hi again, everybody. April is Autism Awareness Month. It is such an unusual and challenging time for everybody during the Coronavirus pandemic. But for people with autism, there are some unique difficulties. Here is my top ten things to do to help. Talk to us about what is happening. We can hear the news and your conversations, so don’t be afraid to tell us the truth. Give us a chance to communicate our words or feelings in whatever way we can. That might be speaking, writing, or through music or art. We need to talk about it too. Keep us informed about schools or day programs as soon as you learn about changes to the schedule. I can deal with schedule changes way better in advance than last-minute. Try creating a schedule at home each day. That helps lessen anxiety. Do fun things together. We need to see you laugh, even if it’s harder for us to do so. Be kind and generous to those who are struggling and lonely. We know how they feel. Express love to your family. Because they deserve it and you never know how many chances you’ll have. Stay connected to teachers and caregivers who aren’t working right now. They are important pieces in our lives and we miss them. Help us go outside and stay active. Sunlight is important to brighten our day both physically and emotionally. Most importantly, stay safe. We need you and we love you. We can’t survive without you, our families and caregivers. God bless you all for everything that you do every day.

Hi everyone.  I just want to check in so everyone knows that I’m still here and still writing.  I am actually working on writing a novel right now.   That is kind of consuming my mental energy but I am having fun doing it.  The Corona virus has truly been a disruptive force for all of us.   I am very thankful that my family can be together during this crisis.    I am concerned for my dad because he works on the front line in the emergency department. He is treating sick people that have it.  I hope that Father in Heaven spares him and our family but also realize that throughout history, epidemics do not play favorites.   So, all we can do is have faith, pray, stay away from others the best that we can and let Father in Heaven decide what is best.  I do have hope in Christ for a better world to come and also that his teachings and example and gospel can help us deal with the crises that we face in this one.   I hope you all stay home, stay safe and use the time to strengthen your relationships with your family and with a Heavenly Father.  Aaron.   

I am super excited for spring.   I love the feeling of sunshine.     Just being outside does wonders for my feelings of anxiety and depression. Cool nights and fresh air are what I love most about living in Colorado.  May is one of my favorite months of the year.  I love to see new buds on our trees and the rolling hills turning green.   It is time to get out there and enjoy the beauty of the nature that god has given to us.   Be thankful for such beauty.  Aaron.

April is Autism Awareness Month and once again, like wildflowers in Texas, you start seeing blue puzzle pieces adorning lapels and Facebook posts sharing news reports giving statistics and asking for money for autism-related non-profits. When April turns to May, the news cycles move on to something else and the coaches put on a different pin and everyone goes back to their routine and give little thought to autism. Unfortunately, I don’t have that luxury. Autism for me is a life sentence. Many people know someone with autism–probably most people, in fact. I would bet that they have wondered how they can help but just don’t know how. Here are some ideas from someone who has autism: 1. Smile at someone with special needs. They are there on the inside and would love to be acknowledged. I would rather have someone get upset with me than just ignore me. 2. Try your best to have a simple conversation. We want to be able to talk with you, it is just hard. Every effort is appreciated. 3. Give families with autism a break. They are dealing the best they can. If their child acts out in a store or a movie theater, don’t judge them or scowl at them. You don’t understand how hard it is to even go out of the house sometimes. These parents are heroes and deserve help and respect, not scorn. 4. Be willing to pay just a little in taxes to develop the resources for the needs of those affected by autism. We don’t want to be a drain on society but we really can’t survive without support and some of us have too many challenges for our families to handle alone. Currently, resources for young adults with severe autism are sorely lacking and the waiting lists for appropriate help can be decades long. This is not ok. We need your help. 5. Special education needs more teachers and better approaches to recognize the intelligence of the kids that they are serving. 6. If you can, give jobs to people with special needs. It might take us longer to learn but we will be loyal and will always do our best. 7. Give a hug to the siblings of special needs kids. They deal with a lot. 8. Don’t underestimate us. Instead, be creative in finding ways to help us thrive and you will be surprised at what we can do. 9. Be an advocate. If you see someone being treated poorly, stand up for them. 10. Kids with autism are special kids, not just because they have special needs but because they are strong, intelligent, capable and loving. Help them learn that about themselves. It will change their lives and yours. Aaron  

Today, my dad and I went cross country skiing at the Country Club at Woodmoor right here in Monument. We got enough snow over the weekend that they could groom the trails on the golf course. It was nice and sunny and the temperature was great for being outside with a light jacket especially when working up a sweat on the skis. It was really fun to just be outside doing something different. We got cross country skis for Christmas but haven’t had much chance to use them yet because of snow conditions or scheduling conflicts. So, it was also cool to feel like I’m getting better at skiing than when I tried it for the first time last year. I think it is a good sport for me because I have good leg muscles and a fit heart and it doesn’t take as much practice as downhill skiing. I think it will help me stay in shape during the winters so that I’ll be more ready for running in the spring. My dad and I want to do the Pikes Peak Ascent this year and then another marathon in the fall. This year is Arizona’s turn. I really am going to work on getting faster and not stopping except at feed zones. I have already qualified for the Boston marathon as a disabled person but that isn’t good enough for me. I want to qualify the same way that I would if I didn’t have autism. Then, I will be satisfied. Autism won’t stop me from being a real runner! I’m going to try for three hours and thirty minutes at the marathon in Tucson. Then, I’ll only have to knock off another twenty five minutes to be BQ official. My dad will have to pick it up some to get that time but I’ll push him like he has pushed me. He’ll be a fast old dude with a young handsome running partner pulling him along.

I am watching a lecture series on how our brains function in creating and storing memories. I am finding it very fascinating. I have always wondered about this because I have a better memory for certain things than the average person, I think. For example, I have pretty vivid memories of some of the things in our house in Colorado when I was just two years old. From what I’ve been told, most people can’t remember that far into their childhood. It’s interesting because that is when my brain was also becoming dysfunctional in other areas ultimately resulting in autism. I think there is a connection. Autistic savants have photographic memories for certain things. Sometimes it’s math or historical events such as dates on a calendar. Sometimes it’s visual, like being able to draw a city map after just seeing it once. Sometimes it is auditory like being able to play a piece of music by ear on the piano after hearing it once. All of these memories are created in different parts of the brain and yet all have autism in common. What is causing this unusual memory storage in the autistic brain? It seems like a pretty big clue about the origin of the problem leading to pretty amazing skills on one hand with severe dysfunction on the other. I am interested to learn more.

After my posts on special education, my mom found a lecture series on Amazon video called the Great Courses. These are lectures given by professors or experts that cover a wide variety of topics in various subjects ranging from art to mathematics and everything in between. I started watching some of these after school and I love it. I am currently starting a series on how our minds learn. It looks like it is going to be super interesting and is right up my alley of things I am interested in. I look forward to gaining some insight into my own brain and hope that I’ll learn some things about how I am most likely to be successful. I might want to do research in this area. I am fascinated by the brain and how it functions and in my case, malfunctions in some areas. I might be a great course learner for a lifetime. I hope so. To the other parents of autistic kids out there, this is a perfect way to give your kids some knowledge on interesting subjects that they won’t get in school or doing ABA. Thanks mom for finding this series and dad for getting me started on them. I am learning new stuff and I love it. This is a good prep for college.

I have been thinking about how I learn the best and how a teacher could best engage me in that process. Maybe this idea would only work for me and not other kids with autism, I’m not sure. But for me, this is how I would structure the day. First thing in the morning, I need some exercise time to get my brain functioning. This doesn’t need to be long, maybe fifteen minutes of stretching or movement would do it. Then, my first class would be something challenging. My brain is most fresh in the morning and I’m most likely going to absorb more. For me, this class would be math or science since those are the subjects that I struggle the most with. I don’t know how to teach me math. The concept is foreign to my brain. I know that many autistics are really good at math, but not me. I think that watching videos is going to be the best for me. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to regurgitate a solution to a math problem but at least I could understand the concept and maybe something would sink in. Just repeating the same thing that I’m stuck on for months and years isn’t very useful though. That is how my math education has been up until now. And not surprisingly, I dread math time. After math, I need something easy that I enjoy. This is the time to read a book to us. But, something age-level and interesting. My parents read to us every night before bed. We have read all kinds of books—everything from Dickens to Steinbeck, Twain to Hemingway—plus fun books like Harry Potter. Reading time is my favorite part of the day. I love hearing about different places and times. After reading, it would be a good time for a break with some down-time. Down-time recharges my battery. I usually like to listen to some music and be by myself for a little bit. Fifteen minutes is enough. Then, it is time to work on communication. We would each need an aide or a peer to work with us. I would want to try having written conversations with that person using the iPad. The more consistent that time is and the more I get comfortable with my helper, the better I’m going to do with them. I need a timer on to tell me how long I need to focus. I can do forty-five minutes to an hour with my dad but had to work up to that. I would want to start with fifteen minutes with someone new. After each interval, I need a break. I could then do another interval. I would dedicate one hour to this in the morning half of the day. Then it’s time for lunch. After lunch, I would do another session of a hard subject. If I did math in the morning, then I would want to do science in the afternoon. Again, I think videos would work the best for me. I would eventually be able to communicate comprehension questions once I got better […]

In my school, field trips would be incredibly important and would be strongly emphasized. We would go on a field trip every month without fail. We would not go to a park or a fast food place but to a museum or a job site or a nonprofit center and do some service. There is nothing that makes me feel better as someone with some needs that I can’t provide for myself than to be able to give something back to someone else. That would be a requirement at my school. We might not be able to do much but we would all do something. Field trips are important because it helps you see the real world and to absorb things from being in different environments. That is how I have learned a lot of new things even if no one else knew that I was learning. When we get to experience new things, it triggers curiosity and that improves our brain function. It’s not rocket science. A rocket science museum would be very cool, though!

I realize that my physical body is stronger than many others with special needs. It is a blessing that I don’t take for granted. I love to run and hike and try new adventures. Being outside does wonders for my brain and decreases my anxiety by about a thousand percent. I suspect that is not unique to me. Even if I couldn’t run, I would want to be outside as much as possible. When I am indoors at school, the sounds are really amplified and hard to block out. The fluorescent lights hum and have subtle waves in the lighting that is distracting. The air conditioner or heater is usually too cold or too hot. Classrooms are honestly not the best learning environment, at least for me. In my school, we would be outside as much as possible. Ideal would be an outside patio with some climate control but still open to the fresh air and natural light. We would spend an hour each day doing some sort of outdoor activity where we get our bodies moving. That would look different for different kids based on their physical abilities. I would think that if I were unable to walk that being pushed around the track would still feel great and I would want to do that every day. Everybody can move their body somehow, even if someone is doing it for you. The mind needs that sensory input, I believe, to be at its best.

Why is it that those who created the curriculum for special education think that we students with disabilities have zero ambition? I can’t understand how they think that all we want to do each day is another stupid set of meaningless tasks that do nothing for our futures. How does a fifty-piece puzzle help me contribute to society? I’m now really good at puzzles. Too bad there aren’t jobs out there that just want you to do puzzles all day. What that is is a time-filler so the teachers can have a break from trying to teach us something interesting or useful. You can’t get away with that in a regular classroom so why is it acceptable in special education? Because we don’t talk back and just do what we’re told or we get carted out of the room because we’re having a “tantrum.” I can tell you that all of the curriculum-developers and teachers would have behavior problems too if they were in our shoes and couldn’t tell anyone. What is the harm in spending puzzle-time reading us some classic books of literature or teaching us lessons from history instead? How could that possibly be less productive than giving us mundane tasks that kindergarten kids can do? I want to learn, not be babysat! In my special-needs curriculum, puzzles would be outlawed and we would read—a lot! I think you would find a classroom of quieter kids with fewer behavior problems that would go home each day feeling a bit more educated. Isn’t that why we are supposed to go to school? Aaron.